A religious posting

So usually when I speak of god(s), I'm speaking of all the people I see at triathlons that I wish I could become. Today, I'm going to talk about God with the capital G.

A funny post for me, I know. While my husband and I founded our marriage on the principal that we wanted to go to church on a regular basis, I don't think we've been to church in oh.... let's just say a long time. Sundays these days are usually spent with 5+ hours of my seat planted on my bike.

Anyways, I went out for my Friday night bike ride. It was a rough ride. For countless reasons that need not be named, I was cranky. My mind immediately wandered off as it always does. I started thinking about school. Particularly the new guy I work with. Gosh I hope he never finds my blog online, because the guy is a little nerdy, and I'm just going to call it the way it is.

I've been trying to befriend the nerd guy, but I just don't have a lot in common with him. Normally I don't have anything in common with women that adore Gucci and similar namebrands. This guy is in a category all his own. He was telling me today that he has diabetes and needs to watch his diet closely. He recently lost a bunch of weight and he's trying to get it in check. His doctor wants him to do 30 minutes of cardio everyday (man, if only!!!) Anyways, he doesn't like sports, running, biking, etc. Huh. That's a tough one. I was trying to encourage him today to find something, anything, just make sure he enjoys it. I suggested dancing. If he wanted to try running, I told him to start slow. 2 minutes running 2-5 minutes walking. He didn't seem interested in the least. Whatever dude, it's your life. I've got enough things to worry about. I don't need to worry about encouraging this guy to exercise (do I?)

So I leave on my bike ride tonight, and I'm thinking about this guy. I'm a really bad Christian, because I haven't thought about God in a while, but for some random reason I suddenly started thinking, "This guy at work is in my life for a reason. I don't know why, but God does. I just know it. Am I supposed to encourage him to exercise? Is he there to help me for some reason that is yet to be disclosed? Are we going to benefit each other in some weird way later down the road?" I don't know why this guy has come in my life, but I need to be nice to his nerdy self. There is a master plan in there somewhere, I just know it.

I'm riding along, and my mind drifts on to other things. God got a whopping two minutes of my wiley brain time. Things started to get really negative. I try not to go there, but I can't help it. I'm extremely stressed out trying to balance school, coaching, Ironman, and family. I had to stop because I was hitting meltdown status. Seriously, if you don't understand Ironman, you have to read the Athena Diaries blog. It is amazing. This gal just finished an Ironman in Louisville. Her account has me scared to death. I'm so worried that I'm not going to make it before the 17 hour cutoff. Really, really worried. If I were doing all my workouts, at least I could say, "I did the work. I gave my best. That's the best I could do." But currently, I can't even say that.

Anyways, I meltdown. Meltdown is over, I continue to ride. Thank goodness. I'm gonna do my 2 1/2 hour ride. Only it's now getting dark and I'm an hour from home. But I want to get the full 2 1/2 hours in. I opt to cut it short and turn around and head home, and I'm glad I did. It got dark quickly.

I kept wanting to take my sunglasses off, but I had my yellow lenses in. They were making everything seem brighter. It was actually darker with my glasses off. That scared me. It got darker, and darker, and darker. Stupid, stupid girl!

I hit the point where I had to make a decision as to which was better 1) bike trail: no cars, but tree cover makes it even darker. Spill on the bike or get hit by a car? 2) Get to the streets with streetlights as quick as I can? Only, I'm a triathlete... I don't have no stinkin' reflectors on my bike. Yeah, right! Only I'm also dressed in all dark colors. Not good either. I decide to do bike trail as long as I can, then switch to streetlit roads. I was getting nervous. It was getting seriously dark.

Wouldn't you know it. Just as I'm about to head to the car filled roads, I look down, and somebody's flashy light must have fallen off. It's laying right there on the ground, blinking and begging to ride with me. I just couldn't believe my luck. What are the odds? I hadn't seen another cyclist in an hour. Did somebody leave it there and intend to come back and get it? No, that's just dumb. Why would you leave it? It HAD to have fallen off somebody's bike. It's one of those freaky things that really makes you question divine intervention. It doesn't mean that I won't hit a crack and spill, but it does give me some visibility from cars that might not see me and do a whole lot worse to my body.

I can't help but think God was watching over me and encouraging me in some way. If nothing else, maybe it was a "Hey, good to have you thinking about me. It's been awhile" sentiment. Maybe it's a sign that I need to be nice to the new guy. Huh.

Enjoy the journey

So I was pretty down because my workouts fell apart the last two weeks. I just couldn't balance Back to School night, coaches meetings, and all my responsibilites at school with my training. But I'm back on the up and up. I got in 11 hours of working out over the weekend, and for that, I feel good.With that much time on my feet and pedals, I had some time to think... A lot of time actually.

Some random thoughts:

- I can't get down on myself for putting school in front of my triathlon. I believe that if you're gonna do something, you should do it 100%. In the case of my teaching career, I strive to be the best teacher I can be. I'm not perfect, nobody is. But if I let myself get behind in my lessons and school work, I'm not just letting myself down. I'm letting my students down. And they don't deserve that. I owe them and society my best. From here on out, I do the best I can to fit my training in, but I can't feel bad when I put my students and classroom first. That's just the way it has to be. No more guilt trips.

- Friday night I turned down Happy Hour with some coworkers. I also turned down a birthday gathering for one of my favorite gal pals. I didn't have the heart to give a reply to her evite, "Wish I could make it, but I have to ride my bike." On a Saturday or Sunday would be one thing, but on a Friday night????? Gosh, am I lame or what?

- I turned down the social events Friday night. I also turned down a baby's 1st birthday party Saturday morning. I did get to go out with some dear friends Saturday night, which was really nice. Because some of those friends were out-of-towners, everybody was going to get up Sunday morning to go out to breakfast. Once again, I had to turn that down so I could ride my bike. I'm now occasionally having those moments where you're actually looking forward to the "big" triathlon being over so you can have your social life back.

- So one moment I want to quit spending so much time swimming, biking, running--but at the same time, I am seriously the most fit I've ever been in my entire life. Other times I tell myself, "When this journey is over, I want to continue all this working out so I can maintain this figure!"

- And then there were my long runs and long bikes this past weekend. Do you know I really enjoyed both of them? I really did! I had so much stress last week, that run was a wonderful stress reliever. And my bike on Sunday??? Wow. Initially I thought I would be blogging about the downpour I suffered through, but I skirted the storm north while the storm moved southeast, so I just got sprinkled on. The sun came back out about three hours into my ride. I crested Dinosaur Ridge to look over on Red Rocks. It was absolutely beautiful. I talked myself out of riding over to Red Rocks (1. because those are some steep hills, and 2. It was time for me to turn around.) I told myself, "Next long ride..." And then I smiled. Because at that moment, I couldn't wait until my next long ride.

They say the training is the hardest part of doing an Ironman. I have no doubt they are right. But it's so awesome when you have those moments where you truly enjoy the training.

Here's to a week where I hit all my workouts! As a fellow IMFL 07 blogger says, Enjoy the adventure! It's going to be a good week.

I am an Ordinary Mortal

Two thoughts for the week:
1) I am an ordinary mortal. I am not Super Woman. I am not AquaMan.

Think about it. What other sport allows ordinary mortals to be in the same event, at the same time, on the same course as super human athletes with unbelievable strength and speed? Okay, rumor has it you might see Lance Armstrong on the Ragbrai course--and that's about as ordinary mortal as you can get! But the NFL? MLB? No chance you'll ever be on the field at the same time as David Beckham. Just not gonna happen!

2) Dealing with missed workouts is very much like dealing with the stages of grief. First, you're in denial. "I'll get up and do it tomorrow. Really I will." When it doesn't happen, you get angry at yourself. Stupid, stupid girl!!! Argh! Then, you start to get depressed. Who did I think I was? How did I ever think I could possibly do this crazy thing called triathlon? Lastly, you accept that you missed the workouts, and you just have to move on and do better next week. You have to.

Life

I'm an obsessive-compulsive teacher, middle-school volleyball coach, friend, wife, and struggling triathlete. When I have too much on my plate I stress because I can't put all my eggs in one basket and obsess on that one thing. This week, everything ended up prioritized in that particular order. I don't want "triathlete" to be last, but I can't afford to move any of the other things to last, either. Ugh.

Official 5430 Race Report

I did it! I finished the 5430. And it was hot, and it was hard, but I did it. I was really struggling with nerves beforehand because I had my times pretty much figured out, and I knew I was going to come in close to last. Luckily triathlon is so popular in Colorado, I managed to beat out 60 people! So I wasn't last! But I still had the seven hours and 45 minutes that I expected. (Actually it was 7:40--I went a wee bit faster than I anticipated in the swim, a wee bit faster than I anticipated on the bike, but slower than expected on the run, which isn't really that unexpected.) I was also surprised by the lack of women in this race. I don't feel as poorly about being in the back of the pack when the men outnumbered the women almost 4:1.

In the end, I don't care what my time was. I finished on a scorcher of a hot day, on a run course that doesn't have a single tree for shade ANYWHERE on the course, and I did it!!!!!

THE PLAY BY PLAY:

The swim: I was definitely fighting off the urge to cry before the gun went off. Knowing that filling my goggles with water pre-race was a bad idea, I was able to keep the tears at bay. Listening to other girls share in nerves and tears, helped, also.

While I know how to breathe bilaterally, I went back to the unilateral breathing just so I could get more oxygen and calm the nerves for awhile. I switched on and off later on. The bad part was that I took in a couple good swallows of water. I don't think it was sitting well in my stomach. I'm scared because I can't let that happen in Florida! Florida is a saltwater swim!!!!!

Anyways, swim and swim I did. I was so excited because I realized that I may have self-seeded poorly. I always start in back, but I was having to maneuver around women, so maybe I could have started a little, not much, but a little closer to the front. The first round of guys caught me at the first turn buoy. Boy, do they paddle hard! One guy paddled down my back instead in front of his chest. I tried to move out of the way every time a guy came up next to me after that. A kick or swat from a girl just doesn't seem to hurt as much as when a guy does it. Hopefully the guys will all swim ahead of me right away in Florida.

I was ready to get out when the 1.2 miles came to an end. I was happy. I did it. But I was ready to get out. I'm having a tough time imagining doing a second loop in the big big race in November. Ugh. Smiles abound when I got out!!! Final time: 46:27.

The bike: Not much to report on here. I knew that any over exertion at all would take away from the run that I struggle with already. So I took it slooooooowwww. Every man, woman, brother, sister, aunt, uncle, and grandmother passed me. I'm not used to that, because the bike is usually my strongest event, but this isn't a race for casual cyclists. I had to suck it up, and that's exactly what I did. I just maintained a nice, slow pace.

By the time I finished, there weren't very many people left on the course. Oh well, I still felt pretty good, and that's exactly how I wanted to go into the run. Nutrition on the bike was a struggle. I knew exactly how many calories I needed each hour, and I usually prefer some solid food on the bike, but I found myself stuffing half a Clif bar in my mouth, and then having to consciously tell myself to chew. I definitely struggle to eat or drink when I exercise heavily.

My butt was really starting to hurt at the three hour mark. I also had to pee really badly and they didn't have any porta-potties on the course!!! I couldn't believe that!!!! I know I've seen articles about how to pee on the bike, but I never thought I could actually do it, so I never read the articles.... I'll tell you what, I was ready to try it, if only it didn't look like I was going to pee on my water bottles. I did find a construction worker nasty and disgusting porta potty on the side of the road about 3/4 the way through. I didn't care. It was heaven in a grey smelly plastic house!

I finally finished the bike three hours and thirty-eight minutes later, and I was a happy girl. (Or should I say, my butt was a happy butt!) Even if I was just about to embark on my worst event.

The run: Well, it was cloudy for the swim, and the clouds had burned off near the end of my bike. It was now 11:00 a.m. and I was about to run half-marathon in the hottest sun of a 95 degree day, on a course with no shade. Baby steps. I took off ultra slow.

I was doing well. At mile 2 I even picked up a friend. I'm a strong believer in picking up friends. She must have had the same mentality because she was making small talk too, the kind that was worthless otherwise, but when you're trying to take you're mind off the pain, every little sidetrack is golden. I spent a little longer than she did at the aid station at mile 3, so she was off. I wished her luck!

I walked only the aid stations on the first of two loops. I was happy about that. My time wasn't very good. I would have to do the exact same time the second loop to get my goal of 3 hours. I knew that wasn't going to happen. I saw my husband as I started loop two and he asked how I felt. I told him that my legs were getting stiff. I wasn't kidding. I've done several half-marathon races prior to this, and my legs always stiffen up around mile 10. That's how they felt and I was only 6 1/2 miles in. Deal with it kiddo.

There were a couple hills from miles 7-8, and I had told myself I was allowed to walk them on the second loop. Only, my legs completely cramped up and when I started to jog again I could only make it about 15 steps. It was awful. I tried again, same thing happened. For a moment the thought of not finishing crossed my mind. "You can NOT walk the rest of this race!!!!" A girl came by and asked me if I was alright. "Yes, thanks for asking. I think I just need some water." Five people passed me right there, and I couldn't help but think I was five positions from last, and now they all passed me. Things were getting bad...

I think my body temperature was getting the best of me. It was so hot out. I had thought about buying salt tablets at the expo yesterday, but I also know you should never try anything new on race day, so I didn't. Bad choice, I think they would have been good for me. I walk/jogged to the next aid station (is that how it's going to feel in the Ironman????? Boy, if I wasn't scared before, I am now!!!!) When I got to the aid station, I took about 10-15 cups of ICE water and wet down every inch of my body, down the shirt, down the shorts, you name it, it got drenched. It was the best ever. I managed to lower my body temperature and I found the energy to jog again.

Luckily, the next aid station wasn't terribly far ahead. I went through the same routine again. The volunteers were so awesome at that station. They had "Car Wash" signs and wet sponges and a sprayer. "Gatorade? Water? Flat Coke?" I told them I wanted it all. I passed on the chips and pretzels, but I took all three beverages questioning how all three were going to sit, but that seemed to sit just fine. I was suddenly doing better than ever!!! The next aid station had some moms and their kids, they were a little confused at the number of water cups I wanted to douse myself in, but I didn't care. I asked for more Coke at the next aid stations, but they didn't have any more.

At the last Olympic distance race I did, I had some water buffalo syndrome going on. I was real hesitant to drink a lot at the aid stations on my first loop because I thought it would weigh me down, sit in my stomach and cramp up. It was funny how on my second loop, I didn't care, and it didn't seem to bother me. I just couldn't seem to get enough to drink on my second loop. Never did weigh me down.

Mile 10. I don't' know what it was about that sign, but I was a happy girl. Somehow I knew that I could do 3 more miles. I love hiking and biking up mountains, because it always amazes me when I look down and see how far I just traveled upwards. I tried to imagine my race this way. Look how far you came!!! You just swam 1.2 miles! You biked 56 miles! And you just ran 10 miles! You can do this!!!!!

Not sure where I got the energy from, but I suddenly had a new goal. All along I had just tried to take it one mile at a time. Thirteen one mile jogs, right? Well I had three one mile jogs left. I just had to make it to the next aid station. And if I could pull each of these one miles off without walking until the aid station, I could really boast to my friend Amy, my husband, and to my coach. Funny how I don't really think they cared, but at that moment in my mind, they cared. They're also the people in my life that would be happy for me if I was happy.

And you know what? I did it! No walking (with the exception of those aid stations--I continued my full body shower standing at the side of the table like it was a buffet table.)

I did it!

7 hours, 40 minutes, 34 seconds.

822/884

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Afterthoughts: Good swim, well planned bike, even if it was slow. The run? I did the best I could, and that's the best I could give. Can't ask for more than that. Miles 7-8 were scary though.

I've wanted to do this race for two years now. I did it and I'm so proud of myself. I was very, very sore that evening and the next day. It enforced the absolute NEED I have for extrinsic motivation. My friends that support me and cheer me on really do help my feet keep moving. Is that a bad thing? Or just a human thing?

Someone told me to be careful if I wanted to do a half-Ironman before my full, because when I finished, I might not believe I can do the full. That's not true. I believe I can do the full. I do, but I believe it's gonna hurt like I've never felt hurt before. School has now started and I have a much more limited workout schedule. This race enforced the fact that I need every ounce of training I can fit in between now and November. I can't afford to cut corners. Because if I'm not devoted to the training, I won't be able to finish the big daddy. I'm glad I had this experience.

Well, I officially had to punch in to work this morning. I left around 5:30. I came home, got a quick bite to eat, and went off for my bike ride. The main difference I noticed about riding in the evening verses the middle of the day???? The bugs.

I've never been fond of the little winged critters. Ask my parents! I made many a promise to make life miserable if they took me camping again! Lo and behold, I take up backpacking and move to Colorado. They're scratching their heads. But I have a little secret that they don't realize, Colorado doesn't have as many bugs as the midwest! We still have SOME bugs, just not as many. And apparently they like to come out at dusk and hang out on the bike path.

So school has started. Today and tomorrow we don't have kids, just meetings. Some of the meetings are boring, some are inspirational, some make you wonder how on earth someone thinks you're qualified to do everything they expect of you. The nice thing about my current school is that I really like some of the teachers I work with. I've worked at several schools now, and the staff at this one is by far the best.

One of the guys I work with also moonlights at a bike shop. How's that for good luck? My bike was missing a bar end and that could get me DQ'd in a race, so he told me to come in tonight. With some electrical tape, we were able to squeeze a bar end in. But then he looked at my chain...... "TURTLE!!!! When was the last time you lubed your chain??????" I buried my head in my whatever I could find. I knew it was bone dry when I left the house tonight. I could hear it as I pedaled to the bike shop. "Turtle!!!! Do you know what the tire pressure is in your tires????????" Nope, I just hopped on the bike and took off. Pretty standard for me lately...

With a fatherly smile and some head nods, he fixed up the bike, and boy! It really did ride better! Lesson here: Keep your chain lubed up and check the air pressure in your tires ladies and gentlemen! On a regular basis!!!!

Notice I haven't mentioned my half ironman this weekend........? I... I.... I'm... mmm..... a... little... scared....

le downpour

I got my wish...

Today - three hour bike ride. I'm having some motivational issues, but I realized that this might be the last midweek bike ride that I can take for awhile without racing the sunset in the late evening hours. In less than a week I'll be sitting in some boring meeting, looking out the window, and daydreaming that I'm out on my bike. That helped the motivational issues... I got out and made a conscious effort to enjoy... And enjoy it I did.

1 1/2 hours in - I look up and it's getting pretty overcast. Huh, I still have an hour and a half to go and those clouds are building pretty fast. Hmmmm....

30 minutes from home - a light pitter patter starts to fall. The kind that isn't worth leaving your windshield wipers on. It continues for about 20 minutes and in a weird way, all I could think about was "Bring it on!" I've yet to have one ride this summer where I got totally dumped on. It always starts just as I'm a block from home. Which in many respects is very lucky, but C'mon! If you're training for an Ironman, don't you really need 1 or 2 'I got caught in a massive storm and the lightning bolt was 3 inches from my head' stories!!!???

I'm nearing home. The rain is even lighter now, and I'm gonna be 15 minutes short of my 3 hour mark. I decide to take the long way home that I well know will put me 15 minutes over the 3 hour mark, but oh well...

Soooooooooooooo... Those rainclouds must have heard me, waited til I decided to take the long way home, and then BAM! decided to test my will! As soon as I made the turn for the long route, that cloud decided to rear its ugly head and opened up and gave me every last ounce of precipitation it had in it. COMPLETE downpour for 20 minutes. Soaked to the bone... Water running off my helmet like a downspout. Shoes and socks are literally sloshing. It was beautiful. Of course it let up just about the time I pulled into my driveway. And the sun was peeking through about the time I got out of the warm shower...

But it was a beautiful thing, I really mean it. What an amazing ride! I knew that people were driving by feeling sorry for that poor girl on her bike. The whole time I just wanted to sit up and throw my arms in the air like a 1st place tour rider and yell, "I'M GONNA BE AN IRONMAN!!!!" Yahoo!

It started.

Today I had to sit in a CPR/First Aid training class from 8 - 4:30. It was the type of class that really could have been condensed into 3 hours max. I'm required to have the yearly certification to be a coach at my middle school. And I'm not complaining about taking it, because I don't mind the refresher. But geez, it took ALL day, and it really didn't need to.

I had the gym bag in the car and immediately went straight to the pool. I got about 1000 yards in to my workout when the 10 yr. old swim team came in and took over the pool. They have to leave one lane open, but it's the lane that all the non-swim team 10-yr.-olds like to splash around in. And apparently, I was definitely in THEIR way. I was suppposed to do sprints, too. And sighting practice and sprints just don't go hand in hand. I gave up and got out.

I got a quick bite to eat and went to school to work in my classroom from 6:30 - 10:00 p.m. Who was I really kidding when I thought I would leave school and hit the rec center at 10 p.m. to finish my run for today?

Boy, is my summer triathlete lifestyle in for a rude awakening.

Get off the computer. Now.

Well, the posts are gonna become fewer and far between. I shouldn't even be playing on here now, but, what the heck. I've got a million things running through my head, and I'm procrastinating my workouts anyways.... Hey, perhaps that's why we bloggers enjoy blogging so much afterall. It's not for the camaraderie (ok, a little), it's not so we can look back and see where we were and how far we've come (ok, some), and maybe it's not even so much about giving my family that lives 2000 miles away a chance to see what I'm up to (but it's a perk). I think I've realized that blogging just gives me a reason to procrastinate my workouts!!! Hmmm.... On this particular afternoon, I think I have hit the nail on the head!

School is about to start and I'm a queen freaker-outer. I've been dropping in to school every day to try to make my workload the first couple of weeks easier on myself. I still have a lot of work to do before the kids start. Sigh.... (Note to self----Do not start freaking out yet. Do NOT start freaking out yet!)

Talked to my coach today, and he encouraged me to do another local half ironman in September before my Ironman Nov. 3. He said it would be "A confidence booster". I'm not really seeing that. I'm seeing it as a another reason to freak out... but we'll see. Perhaps the fear will help me to really stay focused on my training once I go back to work. I know last year I started out strong the first week of school, but my workouts quickly dwindled to nothing as I spent many 12 hour days getting things figured out that first month of school. I can't let that happen this year! C'mon Turtle! Get off the computer and either do some lesson planning or GO WORKOUT! NOW! Before you start freaking out again!!!!!!!!!!!

p.s. Thanks for all the cereal mom!

My dad worked at Kellogg's for 30+ years and I'm the lucky benefactor of Kellogg care packages once or twice a year. It was a life saver when I was in college! Apparently my husband learned the glory of Ramen in college, but never cereal. He's in hog heaven right now!